Author Archives: Humor Happens
Reflections or Reality
Sometimes, I enjoy reflections more than reality. Memories of good times with friends and family, laughter over silly moments, and seeing the wonders at the Nature Center. Sometimes the memories are where I’d rather be when I’m working on a project I don’t care for, I have to hang up the laundry, or a loved one passes on from this earth.
And yet, without reality, there are no reflections to enjoy.
Through the Looking Glass
Today was my first day in my new glasses. Lovely, aren’t they? Well, that depends on which side of the lens you’re on.
My right eye has changed significantly, and not for the better. Therefore, the lens is stronger. I was warned this would take some getting used to. Days even.
Seriously! I have NO depth perception while adjusting! Thank goodness there’s next to no one in our dissipating office, because I’m walking like a big, ‘ole drunk.
Outside is worse! It was such a pretty day, I thought I’d take a walk after work. Bad idea! I should have either put my old glasses on or used a cain. I had to lean on our elderly, three-legged dog to make it back to the house. Crazy, patchy green grass with clumps of weeds to further decrease my ability to see how close or far away the ground would be.
Morale of the Story: Listen to the doctor. When they say take it slow, then take it slow. There’s no need to make the dog suffer.
Last Spring
Here’s an image from last year April. The buds will not be this far in bloom before the end of April this year.
That is a good thing.
This year, the buds are arriving slowly and on time.
That is a good thing.
This year, the weather is warming slowly and over time.
That is a good thing.
So long as the rest of the year is calm and kind, we’ll have apples, peaches, pears, and plums in the autumn.
That is a delicious thing!
Morale of the Story: Good things are worth the wait.
It Takes All Kinds
What do you see in this photo?
Flowers
Grass
Concrete
Moss
It takes all kinds in this world to get anything done.
Lord, thank you for …
Skinny
Fat
Tall
Short
Happy
Sad
Doctors
Janitors
Manufacturing
Agriculture
Writers
Readers
… Amen!
Picture Please!
A friend said that if I’m going to continue writing this blog, which has not been easy to do daily, I really need to include a photo each and every day. Since photography is one of my preferred activities, I was glad to hear it.
This is an image of an adorable plastic egg I bought at Dollar Tree in a packet of three. When a bunch of chicks were coming over, I put them together with a cute statement about chick friends with some chocolates. Everyone got one. Even me!
Morale of the Story: It’s good to love others. Just remember to love yourself too!
The Chocolate Tale – It’s Gripping!
Spoiler Alert: There is none! Read this review, and you’ll still be able to enjoy the book.
I started reading this incredible book by the magnificent Joel Glenn Brenner last year. I had to put it aside to do my annual Christmas book marathon (my annual adventure in reading all Christmas-related books I can get my hands on from Thanksgiving until New Years or later). My colleagues were so very glad I set it aside because each day I would report at work each and every new bit of information I learned the night before. They needed a break!
I finally caught up on my book group books, so I was able to pick it up again a week ago. My colleagues are relieved I’ve finally finished so the litany of daily facts is done. We can now get to work by Noon.
This was an amazing book! I don’t know why it isn’t required for all sales, marketing, manufacturing, and business classes in colleges nationwide. What a remarkable history! The Emperors of Chocolate are the Mars and Hershey companies. This book covers EVERYTHING from where chocolate comes from to how it becomes a candy bar, how the companies started in kitchens and are now worth billions each, family owned business vs. not, and how to create a marketing plan … or not.
I was addicted to this book just as my brother, an orchard man, is addicted to all things apple trees or my sister a chef is hooked on all things baked. The thrill of learning how everything works in building a factory from the ground up to the battle to be the #1 chocolate company in the US of A. I couldn’t have been more intrigued.
I highly recommend you read this! When I like various points or quotes from a book, I use a sticky note to write it down later. However, by the time I set this book aside for my Christmas reading journey, I had at least 30 markers! I called my local bookstores to buy it but I was very sad to find that it’s out of print. I know! Who would let such a thing happen? I don’t have a clue. I hope your local library has it, as mine did. I was able to purchase a few copies from Amazon.com and transfer my markers to my own copy. I gave a few away for Christmas as well. You could borrow mine, but don’t mess with my sticky markers, and you might have to put down a deposit so that I’m assured to have it back.
Here’s the kicker: I really don’t even like chocolate much! Oh, sure, I enjoyed it as a child. Yet over the years, it has appealed to me less and less, especially chocolate candy. Absolutely no dark chocolate, I find it bitter (unless it’s accompanied by mint, then it’s ALL good). Now chocolate cake, pudding, or cookies is a whole other matter – those I enjoy. I’m turning into my brother and a cousin Vicky who find most chocolate icky. No matter, this book remains top on my list and it will for years to come! Come, join me in being a fan of this remarkable tale!
Dear Mother Nature
Dear Mother Nature,
I have defended your chilly winds, snowy days, and gray rains. No, Michigan is not supposed to have temperatures in the 80s in January, February, or March like it was for a time last year. We needed the chilly weather and rain to have great produce in the fall. But aren’t you taking this a bit far?
It’s late April. Yes, we need April Showers for May Flowers. But really? Snow? Hail? Freezing rain? Mother Nature, this is taking it to the extreme.
We, the people of these United States, are ready for the temperatures you have made us accustom to in April. We’ve taken the brunt, we’re ready for the reward of spring. And then summer. Take your time with autumn. Winter is needed, but no rush, so long as it’s a white Christmas.
Yours sincerely,
We, the People
Lovers of Warmth
PS: By warmth, I don’t mean hot. Let’s not go overboard like last summer with lots of temps in the sweaty, nasty 90s. Seriously, some moderation, please!
Not Again!
Not again will I leave my car outside with the windows open, or anywhere, overnight, with the windows down.
Why? The first reason is probably more life endangering, but the second reason sticks in my memory more firmly.
The first time I realized it might be a poor choice to leave my car outside with the windows down was in the rain. Well, perhaps rain is not the right word. Ragging Thunder Storm would be more accurate. My car was parked between the garage and the power lines with the car windows down overnight.
When I tried to go to class for college the next morning, it had poured a drenching rain which included thunder and lightning and gusting winds. My plush car seats were soaked through to the metal rails, and the floor hadn’t fared much better. It took weeks to dry out. Fortunately, my car and I had the opportunity to enjoy those weeks of wet pants and squishy beach towels together. Why? Because hanging equal to the back bumper’s height was the electric line. Only 1.5 inches from the car. Let’s just say that I did NOT drive to class that day. Lesson learned: Do not leave car outside … with the windows down … near live wires.
Yet, there was another lesson to be learned. This sticks in my mind far more, and yet it shouldn’t. I, foolishly, had learned the first lesson, but not the second: Do NOT leave the windows down! Ha! Here’s how that lesson was imbedded into my soul.
A few years later when I was working at my first grown-up, full-time job, I got in my car to go to work.
I slowly backed out of the garage.
I got out of the car and shut the garage door.
I got back in the car.
The sun was bright, so I put down the visor.
I jumped screaming like a banshee from the car dancing a creeped out jig.
There was a moth the size of the visor sleeping on the visor.
Dear old dad came to the rescue, laughing at me, half bent over from hysteria, until he saw the moth for himself. He sobered up quite quickly and nearly knocked himself unconscious by standing up straight to jump back. When he recovered, he gently removed the largest moth either of us has ever seen to this day. Well, dad’s in heaven now, so perhaps he has met larger moths. I can’t be sure.
Any which way, the windows are not down in my car when I tuck myself in each night. Not even one little, teeny, tiny crack. Not again!
Humor Happens 